A Comparison Of My Daughters: Age 4

I'm going to do that thing that no mother should ever do: compare my children.  (To each other, not to anyone else's children...)

For the last few months I've been amazed by Rose and all the things she's up to.  So much so that I am constantly comparing her (in my mind, of course) with how Emma was at her age.  They are almost complete polar opposites.  It's astounding to me.

Emma at 4 - With 1 year old Rose peeking out the window.

Emma was always my quiet girl.  Well, once she got over being the baby that cried ALL THE TIME.  She was never a chatty kid.  She's 7 now and she's more chatty than before but still very content to sit and listen to what's going on around her.

Rose, on the other hand, was a quiet, easy-going baby, and now she never stops talking.  Just yesterday we watched Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, and she talked through the whole thing.  "Who is that?"  "Where are they going?"  "When does Harry get his owl?"  "Is that person going to teach them?"  "That's a lot of children!" and so on.  I actually had to walk away, she was way too distracting!

Rose at 4 - always playing

The junior kindergarten experience is vastly different between the two girls.  To be fair, kindergarten education has changed since Emma started.  Rose is now having full-day everyday class where Emma went every other day and alternating Fridays.  Regardless, I think they would have had different experiences without that change.  They are vastly different kids!

Rose is now "air writing" everything she sees everywhere.  People's shirts, billboards and signs anywhere, and if words show up on tv.  She is so interested in letters (and numbers) and especially the ones in her name.  We have to trace words in every book we look at and she talks about the letters and the sounds and all that "academic" stuff all the time.  Emma never was interested in letters the same.  It was a struggle to "work" at school stuff with her.  Now (at 7) Emma likes words and reading and all that, but at 4 she had no interest.

The other big difference I'm seeing is the after school conversations.  Emma always told us she never did anything at school and it was "boring."  Rose, on the other hand, will talk for ages about who was at school and what they did and who was mean and all that.  I don't always understand what she's talking about, but boy does she talk!  She loves her class and her teachers and it really shows.  Not that I think Emma didn't enjoy her days then but she would rarely talk about it without considerable prodding from us parents.

I find it so fascinating that two little people who sprung from the same gene pool can grow and learn in completely different ways.  Life is a constant social experiment, especially when kids are involved.

Do we treat the girls differently?  Likely.  They are different people with different needs.  Rose needs the affection and cuddles and constant physical contact (especially when she's tired) while Emma is content to colour quietly or watch videos or movies alone, and without asking a million questions about what's going on.

We are fortunate that despite their differences (or because of them?) they are fast friends.  We don't really have "real" fights around the house.  Well unless they are with us parental people.  Sure, feelings get hurt (more often Rose's) but Emma knows how to work things out and give in to Rose when she's about to have a meltdown.

I'm intensely curious to see where the girls go from here.  Will Rose be fluently reading by age 5 1/2, due to this early interest in letters?  Will they stay emotional (and verbal) counterbalances to each other?  This raising kids business is way more interesting (and challenging!) than I ever thought.

Share your household's dynamics with me.  I love hearing other families observations of their kids and their differences (or similarities).  Post your comments below for me to marvel over!

Last Day of School - And An Awesome Compliment

Today is Emma's last day of grade 1.  She is not as excited as I thought she'd be.  I'm excited for her.  I think, perhaps, she will miss her friends, as her school encompasses most of the city (she's in Catholic French Immersion and there's only one in town.)

Rose was mad she didn't get to
go to school on Emma's first day
(Sept 2014)

We've had some trials and tribulations with her schooling this year.  Her mid-term report card was less than stellar - both the "grades" (checkboxes actually) and the comments from the teacher (which were not very helpful).  Luckily we worked with the school to overcome some of the issues we perceived (sometimes incorrectly).

She started "reading group" and is now much more interested in reading, thankfully!  (I'm a voracious reader so I can't imaging my children not liking to read!!)  And I think the rest of it was just that she wasn't ready yet.

Transitioning from play-based Kindergarten to "regular class" in grade one has got to be difficult for these kids - and for the teachers who are used to kids coming from the previous style of Kindergarten.  Rose is going to start Kindergarten this fall, and she will get the full experience of all day, play based; whereas Emma started when it was still every other day, so their experiences will be different.  I'm so interested to find out how Rose's adjustment will be.

I'm a bit nervous to see Emma's report card, but it can't be much worse than her mid-term card was.  I am sincerely hoping there's been improvement.  The thing that gets me the most about her schooling this year is the lack of teacher communication.  If my child is not performing where you think she should be, isn't it the teacher's job to tell me that?  To suggest more work at home, or other resources?  We had to call the school and ask about reading help, no one told us that resource was there.  And if you don't think she's struggling why did the "report card" suggest she's barely meeting the minimum requirements for her class?

Maybe I just don't understand fully how the schooling system works.

Anyway, on to my awesome compliment.

I was walking back from Emma's bus stop and I saw a neighbour friend coming out from her apartment across the street.  I could tell she wasn't sure it was me, so I took off my ballcap (it's sunny at the bus stop) and waved at her.  She changed direction so we could have a chat.

I caught up to her and she said "It is you!  I couldn't tell.  I was thinking 'Who's that young girl walking this way?'"  Isn't that awesome?  I'm wearing a dress she likely hadn't seen before, but still!  I was quite pleased.

I guess it's time to get ready for work.

Toodles!

They grow up so fast

Tonight Rose has her Kindergarten orientation...and I have to miss it.  Sometimes being a working mom is great, but not when you have to miss the important things.  Heck, sometimes sharing the parenting duties is hard to do.  Watching Patrick brush their hair differently than I do can sometimes cause me great anxiety too!  I've learned to let him do things his way, but sometimes the wife-y nag still slips out.  I know I should be happy he's doing these things even if it's not the way *I*'d do it...

I am very excited to hear what Rose thinks of this gathering this afternoon at school.  She has been so much more vocal about everything in her life thus far.  Emma has always been a quiet girl.  She always told me school was "boring" and nothing happened there.  Now she is in grade 1 and she does come home and tell me more things, but she is still not a "chatty Cathy."  Rose talks all the time and at great length about who was at daycare and what they did and where they went, and I am desperately hoping this continues into school!

Rose is excited and apprehensive about this next stage in her life.  I share her feelings.  I can't believe my baby is 4 and will be getting on the school bus with her big sister next year!

Toodles!